Comment: Carers - they're more than a label

Tuesday 27 March 2018

Around 14,000 people in Jersey have a disability – a facet of life that can present many challenges.

While some are able to combat those alone – cooking, cleaning, washing and going about daily life without help – many do require an extra helping hand, in some cases 24/7.

Express columnist Melissa Alves, who uses a wheelchair, is calling for islanders to remember the great work that carers do, reminding them that they are more than just a label…

“Ever wondered what it is like to be a carer?

I have seen many people talk about their different views on what it’s like to be a carer, and what it takes to be one.

Sometimes they’ll have an idea, but sometimes the only people that actually know are the ones going through it.

Pictured: Parents should be seen as loving and supportive family members before they are viewed simply as 'carers', Melissa says.

My family provide me with huge amounts of support – emotional, physical or aspirational, they are always there.

But something that personally frustrates me when someone has a disability and needs help with certain daily tasks, the parent or guardian are automatically considered ‘the carer’ – despite the fact that first and foremost, they are parents and loved ones to the person that they are caring for.

As I’ve often seen over the years, that can mean people being considered as carers without considering themselves straight away. In reality, they are mums and dads, husbands, wives, partners, brothers, sisters, friends and neighbours – these are loved ones helping out of the kindness of their heart, so to simply be ‘the carer’ puts a great deal of pressure on them. 

Whether they are parents or carers to their older family from a young age, society puts so much pressure on carers. What we must remember is that they are simply doing what anyone would – caring for a loved one or friend, helping them through when they are unable to do things for themselves.

Pictured: Melissa praises those - both young and old - who selflessly help others.

If they are only ever seen as a ‘carer’, that can put a strain on the relationship with the person they look after, and prevent them from having a life of their own away from their caring role. That label – ‘carer’ – is something society has given them, and it’s not always easy to deal with.

So let’s celebrate the carers. They are people who selflessly help, not because they have to, not because it is their job, but because they want to. They are carers because they are caring – and sometimes, with all the stress of what they do, they need to be cared for too.”

The opinions expressed in this piece are those of the author and not those of the Bailiwick Express.