One last Christmas together?

Wednesday 28 December 2016

A local mediation practice is preparing to see more couples looking for a fresh start for the New year.

Alternative Resolutions (AR) says divorce rates spike at this time of the year and is offering some coaching this Christmas.

Over the past couple of years, divorce rates in Jersey have been rising. In 2015 there were 225 divorce and judicial separation petitions filed, and 183 Decree Absolutes granted to local couples. Between 2013 and 2015, the number of petitions filed in Jersey has increased by 18% and the number of Decrees Absolutes granted has increased by 9%. While these figures reflect divorce rates throughout the year, the majority of divorce actions are known to take place within the festive period.

During the New Year, many conflicted couples make the decision to part ways and make a fresh start after one last Christmas together. Figures show that divorce actions rise by at least 25% in January compared with an average month. Subsequently, the first working Monday after Christmas has become known as ‘Divorce Day’, and the number of people making enquiries about ending their marriage hits its annual peak.

Clair Cousins, Managing Director, Alternative Resolutions,
 says: "Sadly we do see a divorce spike in January. The festive season can be difficult for many families, fraught as it is with expectations and obligations. For many couples the New Year can offer the chance to start anew, but this does not reduce the complexities that can be associated with divorce, including decisions associated with childcare, finances and property.

"Couples usually want to make the divorce process as smooth as possible, particularly if there are children involved. Divorce coaching can provide solutions through effective communication and more unanimous decision making. It can also reduce the chance of conflict and the need to go to court so the results are quicker and far more cost-effective.

"Given these benefits, divorce coaching services should be increasingly explored by couples to reduce the financial and emotional impact associated with divorce. If only for the sake of their children, it can really make their post-divorce relationship better than their married one."

AR say they've designed their divorce coaching to reduce the strain on couples and offer support at all stages of their divorce, from those who are not sure if they should leave their marriage, to clients who are divorced and struggling to move on. The service is intended to equip couples with the right information and preparation, so they have a thorough understanding of all the available options when it comes to divorce and can make informed decisions with confidence and control.

They say divorce coaching can help couples to navigate through many areas, including separation, prenuptial agreements, postnuptial agreements, custody, child support, estate planning, and post-judgment modifications. A divorce coach acts as an impartial third party and should not be mistaken for:

• A solicitor. A divorce coach will not handle the legal side of a divorce but will explain how it works and what choices are available.

• A relationship counsellor. But they work with couples to establish a plan that enables them to move towards the future as a single person.

• A best friend. The coach is not emotionally involved with the divorce. Their impartiality ensures that couples are able to make informed and confident decisions that are not swayed by emotions.

AR say their divorce coaching services work in tandem with mediation, which provides dispute resolution that is four times quicker and more cost-effective than the financial cost of court proceedings. On average, mediations can be conducted over a time span of 110 days, whereas court proceedings last an average of 435 days.