The founder of a neurodiversity charity has praised the “selfless” gesture of a grieving mother who has raised over £2,500 in memory of her son to fund a private ADHD assessment for an islander in need.
Carolyn Connor said that her son Michael, who died at the start of this year, had lifelong mental health issues since early childhood that went unrecognised by the authorities.
She explained that Michael joined the waiting list for an ADHD assessment in May 2022, and had asked for an update on how much longer he had to wait the week he passed away.
Ms Connor started a JustGiving page ahead of her son’s funeral, and called for well-wishers and people that knew him to donate rather than buying flowers.
She had initially sought to raise £1,000 for the assessment and has since upped the target to £2,000 in order to pay for private medication and follow-on care for an islander.
As of February 2025, according to recently released data, nearly 1,000 islanders are currently awaiting ADHD assessments, with some facing delays of up to three-and-half-years.
“The potential to change someone’s life”
Ms Connor’s campaign is being organised with local charity All Matters Neurodiverse. In a statement, founder Niamh Mc Dermott said she was “deeply honored to support Carolyn and her family as they navigate the unimaginable loss of their beloved son, Michael”.
She added: “In the midst of their sorrow, their selfless desire to help others is a powerful tribute to Michael’s memory.
“They wish to honour Michael by offering someone the opportunity he never had – a chance for understanding, support, and a life-changing ADHD diagnosis.
“For many, especially those who have faced lifelong challenges without answers, a diagnosis can be transformative.
“This heartfelt gesture holds the potential to change someone’s life, and we are committed to supporting Carolyn and her family in every way we can to ensure Michael’s legacy brings hope.”
“We suffered his whole life”
Ms Connor said that Michael’s battle with complex psychological and health issues including ADHD were the reason for his issues with drugs and alcohol, and she believes that if he had received the diagnosis and the treatment he needed, it would have saved his life.
“He was a warm, caring person who made some bad choices,” his mother said.
“He didn’t ask for any of this. He asked for help and support and understanding and he didn’t get it. He got nothing.”
Ms Connor said she hopes that the money she has raised will allow at least one islander to get treatment – but she also hopes that it forces the government to take the issue more seriously.
“The government needs to be forced to step up,” she said.
“I’m very vocal because of what’s happened to my son – and I don’t see that others should have to suffer. We suffered his whole life.
“Michael was misjudged and basically ignored, and it didn’t just stop with Michael. We suffered in so many ways that you wouldn’t believe.
“I’m not going to be quiet. I can’t do anything for my son now, but I can do it in name of my son. So somebody else doesn’t suffer.”